My dream job turned into a nightmare

“Oh but you love your job!”
It’s right, I was one of the few people who LOVED what I was doing. Getting up and going into work wasn’t a problem for me, for two years straight.

My boss was a dream mentor, constantly encouraging and challenging me so that I was able to discover and grow in my talents. My coworkers were reliable, smart and genuinely good people.

My day to day routine was challenging, creative and never dull.

I was running marketing for 17 locations of a growing pizza chain. Strategizing menu items and content to reach our target audience was Monday morning, photographing and taste testing the items was Wednesday afternoon, meeting with a new potential vendor was Friday for coffee – you get the idea…

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I felt grateful to love my job and grateful to work with such wonderful people.

One day, everything changed. My boss, whom I loved, let me in on her upcoming retirement, and my new leadership. A bittersweet announcement. More growth for me, and losing my day to day interaction with one of my favorite people.

I took the positive perspective and went on the proactive. I set up meetings with my new leadership to get on the same page going forward, I over-communicated as requested and stayed on top of my game – a new boss means proving your worth again. Slowly, over the course of a few months, I was put on the defense.

Constantly, I was reiterating and justifying processes that were already approved and proved to be effective; and constantly I was validating my timelines and expectations. Constantly, I was asking for goals to ensure what I was working for in marketing would help meet the business goals as a whole. Constantly, I was berated and talked down to. Previously, I’d never cried at work.

The day I marched into a meeting with my new leadership and said, “Do you want me to be successful in this role?” was the last day of cry-free work. The reply was, “I think you’re smart and talented, and you obviously know the business thoroughly, but I just don’t think you’re doing a good job.” I lost it. Like WTF, dude!??

My dream job had turned into a nightmare.

That job I loved, I now felt NO purpose for. And, as an ENFP, I NEED purpose. Any other ENFPs in the house??

I felt so betrayed by the job I loved and career I was making for myself. My coworkers had become my family and work was life; it was devastating. I know, it sounds like I’m being dramatic, but my whole world and happiness for the past two years had revolved around loving my job, so it really felt like the world was ending.

Thankfully, I had just secured a contract position (Which allowed me to directly approach my leadership – and call him out on his B.S.). I told him I was done.

My mentor then told me that of all the employees who have threatened to leave him, I’m the only one who has ever had the balls to actually leave.

To me, the realization that happiness with a job can change because of one person, or one action, or one day, is a relief. It’s ok to have a bad moment, and it’s ok to move on when you realize you’re not in the right place anymore. It’s ok to just live your life from day to day – your end goal, and your way of getting to it don’t have to be set in stone. Part of being human is being flexible, feeling emotions, and making decisions. You may not like the decision you make, but it’s ok. You can make a change. We’re so lucky to be human and be able to change our situations as needed.

Thanks for reading! It feels so good to get this story off my chest.

nassau, bahamas

Alone in Nassau

Otherwise known as “that one time I tried to buy drugs in a foreign country.”

NassauA group of five girls and myself took a Bahamian cruise for spring break. After we spent the morning soaking up alcohol, sunshine and saltwater jet-skiing above the clear blue water in an inlet just outside of Nassau, we decided to head over to Senor Frogs for some food and beverages.

Unfortunately, when you get a group of girls with strong personalities together, which my friends will not deny that they have, people can get annoyed and hurtful things can be said.

One thing led to another and I ended up drunkenly shopping down the main strip of Nassau alone. I don’t consider myself to be particularly brave, but with as much liquor as I had had, I was feeling pretty comfortable with myself and needed to gather some souvenirs for my sister anyway. Although I tend to be a postcard collector, if I can get a product that is native or genuine to the area, I will!

nassau, bahamas

I entered the first shop I came too. The shops were touristy, with shirts with frogs and sharks and beaches on them. Sayings like “Someone who loves me went to Nassau and got me this shirt.” While those can be adorably corny sometimes, I wanted something better for my sister.

I checked out the overpriced swimsuits and cover-ups – designed for people who forgot their swimsuit (or lost theirs?) on their trip or something like that. What’s that? In the back of the shop was a bar, with a lone bartender in front of 3 empty barstools. I can buy a drink while I shop!? What a concept! Brilliant!

Nassau, Bahamas

I got a hurricane and checked with my bartender that it was, indeed, ok for me to walk from shop to shop with this beverage. He assured me.

I sauntered into the next shop, similar items: hats, t-shirts, sunglasses, magnets, etc. I finished my drink and purchased another at the back of this store. My pattern continued as I wandered further and further away from the “tourist-zone.” Eventually, I found a few local shops; an estate sale store and a couple local-looking boutiques. I stumbled into one of the boutiques. The dresses, hats and shoes in this store were not meant to be discovered by tourists like myself.

Digging through the racks with my hurricane in hand, I found the perfect beaded sandals for my little sister. They were gorgeous in my mind, and I knew she would love them!

I paid for my purchase and moved along through the streets, navigating my way back toward the boat when a man stopped me in the street. “Hey, you wanna buy some weed?”

nassau, bahamas

Nassau, Bahamas
“Wait on this corner, I’ll be right back.”

My good mood was persistent, and I thought, “heck, when in Nassau!” I told him yes, and he asked how much. (At this point I was lost. I was not familiar with the terminology.) I ended up asking him how much I could get with $20. He said he’d be right back, I handed him my money and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.nassau, bahamas, cruise

 

I’m an idiot. He wasn’t coming back. So much for serendipitous me! I knew I’d been had. I gathered what dignity I had left and headed back toward the boat. The girls would love this story.

Hey, could’ve been worse. At least I succeeded in soaking in as many hurricanes as I possibly could and had found the perfect gift.

Nassau, Bahamas, girl friends, beach

Nassau, Bahamas, sunset

Thanks for reading! Until next time, adios, ciao, sayonara, good-bye!

Published March 2015.